It was Friday, and as usual for that time of week, I found myself pushing a shopping trolley around the local supermarket. It had become one of my tasks to push the trolley, more by bad luck than by a democratic decision. Another of the undemocratic decisions that I inherited was that I had to also carry the list of basic items that we required, in order that we might survive the following week. Anne my live in girl friend was ahead of me selecting from the shelves most of the items that we required. I would occasionally point her towards items of interest as we approached. Then after a small discussion, and if we require the item, she would pick it up and toss it into the trolley. She also had a keen eye for spotting the bargain of the week. In addition to this, she would always be on the lookout for that little extra item that shoppers always manage to pick up, and in doing so would usually make the storeowners very happy.
We were participating in a routine that we had developed together over the past three years. In fact, we were so regular that you could set your watch by us.
Ours was a relationship that had been made in heaven and I adored every inch of her slender young body. I loved watching her as she pranced along the shopping aisles going from shelf to shelf. I liked the way she picked up each item and read the labels before consulting me as to whether we should have a particular brand or not. I felt like I was allowing her to show off her feminine side to all who were interested in the shop. Then again, I guess you could say that I was possessive and that I did not want to share her with anybody. To which I would have to raise my hand and say yes. After all, who in his or her right mind would want to share such a beautiful person with anybody. I considered myself the lucky person who had been dealt the beautiful hand that was Anne, and I was not going to do anything to jeopardise our relationship. There was no way that I would want her to leave me, and by the same token so why would I want to share her with anybody
Occasionally she would stop and laugh at me as I danced to the piped music that filled the shop. While a few of the shoppers who were watching wished that, they had the nerve to do the same. Then there were the times that I would jump up and place my feet on top of the trolley wheels in an effort to steal a ride down the aisles. She would always laugh at me, but inside she worried in case I lost my footing and crashed into one of the many food displays that cluttered up the aisle. In fact, this had happened to me just a few weeks earlier, and I had been forced to replace all of the cans of beans that I had scattered into every conceivable crevice of the shelving.
We had met quite by chance as I had returned to a shop in order that I might change an unwanted present that did not fit. She had been the girl at the checkout, it being late in the day there were not many people in the shop. A conversation had developed between us ending with her accepting a date with me that very evening.
Anne was a beautiful looking young girl, in her early twenties with a small petite face and long blond hair. It had certainly been love at first sight for us both as we began a whirlwind romance. Then after only four weeks of courtship, she moved in to my flat with me. We had always talked of marriage in those early days but after a time together, the idea was somehow dropped. I think it was because of the way we were living. We carried on just like any other happily married couple. We went everywhere, and did everything together. Always with a laugh, and as far as I can remember we never had a row or a single bad word for each other.
As we made our way down the breakfast cereal aisle, Anne suddenly, remember that she had not picked up a jar of marmalade. Remembering that it was positioned back in the area where the customers first enter the shop. She told me that she would pop back and grab a jar, while I waited where I was.
After waiting around for just a couple of minutes I made my way back to where I knew Anne was heading. Becoming a little confused because I could not see her. So then thinking that I might have missed her as I walked along the bottom of the aisles, and that she might have walked along the top. I set off slowly making my way back to where we had parted company, expecting to find her waiting for me. All that greeted me was a completely empty aisle. I then made my way along all of the aisles that we had not visited, but my efforts were in vain. By this time, I was starting to worry as to what had happened to her. I left the trolley wedged up against the meat counter and retraced my footsteps from one end of the shop to the other, but there was still no sign of her. Then in a vain effort, I repeated the very same operation checking every aisle and corner leaving no area unchecked
By this time, I was very worried wondering what might have happened to her. After all it could not be that bad, as I was only in a shop. It was not as if it was a nightclub or sleazy pub, for Christ sake its just a damn supermarket.
I made my way towards the main checkout counter and asked the girl if she would give a message out on the loud speakers for me. To which she was very obliging and asked that if Anne was in the shop could she return to the counter where a distraught husband is missing her. The message had been given out in a tongue in cheek way, as the girl was always having a laugh with the customers. Only this time she knew she had said the wrong thing the moment she looked back at me. I was furious and not wanting to break into a fit of laughter. After all, I was very worried at this point, this was so uncharacteristic of Anne. Nothing like this had ever happen between us in the past.
I gave it five minutes and then pleaded with the girl to repeat the message, only this time she was a little more diplomatic, just simply asking if Anne could make her way to the checkout. A further five minutes and I was starting to shake in fear of what might have happened to her. I then asked the girl to direct me to the manager’s office, where I explained everything to her. The manager then instructed several of her workers to search the place from top to bottom, and after ten minutes all returned confirming that as far as they were concerned Anne was not on the property.
The manager then asked me for some identification of Anne and myself. It was then that I remembered that I had left Anne’s handbag in the trolley, and that the trolley was by the meat counter. We made our way to the trolley only to be further upset when I discovered that her bag had been stolen, or picked up, as the manager liked to call it. It was then that I asked the manager to call the police in.
They were not much help only repeating what the store manager had already done for him. At least I could show them my identification as I had my wallet. The police went on to tell me that there was not much more that they could do. Until she had been missing for forty-eight hours and then she would only be listed as a missing person. They then started asking me the usual silly questions, like had we had a row in the last twenty-four hours. Were we happily married and the one that hurt the worse did she or I have a lover. The policeman looked at me as he asked the last question, and noticing the look on my face, he stopped me from answering his question. He then went on to tell me that it was all part of his training to ask such questions. He continued to tell me that in situations like this, it was usually one or the other.
I could hear some of the counter staff around us also starting to make silly sarcastic remarks like, she has probably run off with his brother. Look how he is acting, he is so possessive that she just wanted to get away from him. Along with a few more that, I could not quite hear as I was out of earshot. A crowd of people had started to gather around the police officer, the store manager, and myself. To most, I was already beginning to look like the villain or at least the reason for Anne’s disappearance. This line of thought hurt me, if only I could have put into words how much I loved her, I’m sure they would have thought different of me.
About two hours later the supermarket along with the shopping complex closed its doors. I had no idea what to do, as I was escorted from the property. After all, where do you start to look next? I spent some time just walking around the very large car park, until it was completely dark. I then returned home to the flat, inwardly expecting to find her sitting in front of the fire warming her feet. While deep inside, I knew that I was going to be wrong, because as I approached the flat I could see that there were no lights on and that it was in complete darkness.
That first night of being alone for the first time in our relationship was a nightmare for me. I did not know what to do next, I have to admit that I cried for most of the time. For me it was as though I was floating down a river of tears. In fact, I cried so much that my eyes became very sore.
While my instincts kept telling me to go out and to start searching the streets, my brain wondered where would I start, or where would I go. I spent the whole night going over the events that had led up to her mysterious disappearance. Trying to think of any little thing that I might have missed that would shed some light on what might have happened, or where she might have gone. Its funny but at times like this your brain plays tricks on you, and the imagination really runs riot, with some wild scenarios.
The next morning I went along to the police station to find out if there was any news of her. Being upset as I was informed once again that they could not do anything for the time being. They did tell me that they had logged the incident and that they had circulated her description and were keeping an eye out for her.
I spent the rest of the day in or around the area of the supermarket, in the vain hope that she might return. I was beginning the think along the lines that just maybe she might have lost her memory. If that were the case, there was a chance that when it returned she might just return to the shop looking for me. I became a little confused, after all if that were the case, would she not return to the flat. I just did not know what to do. Thinking along those lines, I thought that maybe it might be better for me to return to the flat.
By this time, the story had been well circulated around the shopping centre by the supermarket employee’s. Wherever I walked, I could sense people pointing and talking about me. I did not mind because at least they were highlighting my problem and in this way, there was a possibility that it might jog some body into remembering something. It was all to no avail, it was as if she had just been swallowed up and disappeared from the face of the earth with out leaving a single clue.
The second day she was officially listed as missing by the police. I was also told that until they had some evidence as to what might have happened to her, then that was all they could do. I spent the rest of the day making up posters high lighting her disappearance that included a photo. I then went to the local printing shop and had hundreds of them made up, so that I could flood the area with them. I just had that feeling that somebody out there had to know something and that I would not give up until I found her.
I went into all of the shops, while most were very happy to help me and place a copy in their window. A few of them told me that it was company policy that they do not show posters in their shops. In the shopping mall, I also handed out small hand flyers to anybody passing, who would accept them.
Work was no problem as I rang in and took my three week summer leave, the last thing I needed to happen now was to loose my job. Some way or other I needed to have some money coming in, to survive.
The days started to run into weeks and in that time, I never found a single clue, of what might have happened to Anne. The police had also drawn a blank but had invited me to the station on more than one occasion, for further questioning. Once it was put to me that, I had staged her disappearance and another, time I was asked if I had in fact killed her. The officer went on to tell me that in many so-called disappearances, it usually ended up with a body being found. The end result being that a member of the family was later charged with the murder. Most murder victims know the identity of their killer, they kept telling me.
By the time a month had past the police had started to class me as a bit of a joke and just left me handing out leaflets wherever I went. To me it was no joke, I had lost the only person I had ever loved. My whole world had come crashing down around my ankles and I did not know what to do next. It would not have been so bad if only I could find out what had happened to her. It was the not knowing that hurt me most. If she had gone off with some body else, then after a short period, I could have come to grips with that. It was the not knowing that hurt me the most. There was not a day I woke up and wanted to call off my search, but to me that was out of the question. It became my aim in life to come up with an answer, even if it took me the rest of my life.
It was the nights that I dreaded most, the crying that I did constantly. The loneliness that I had to endure, specially after spending so many nights with her warm body lying beside of me. Then there was the vivid imagination that I possessed, it would conjure up some of the most wired of explanations of what might have happened to her.
Slowly the weeks turned into months, and during this time, there was not a single person in town who did not know my quest or me. I spent every spare moment of my time devoted to the finding of Anne. Although it had taken over my life, I did not worry as her disappearance had left me with nothing. To the rest of the town I was some body whose wife had walked out on him and that I could not accept it.
Then before I realised it the months had turned into a year, I could hardly believe that I had been searching for her for twelve months, and sadly in all that time I had never found a single clue of her where a bouts. To the public, I had become the guy whose wife had walked out on him, after a row over a box of Corn Flakes. A typical reaction from people who had no idea what they are talking about, but loved to fuel the fires of hurt upon their fellow man.